Sorry I've been gone so long ...the last week has been really hard. My Uncle Albert passed and I was devasted. I had just gone to see him in the hospital 2 days before and he seemed fine. He was such a wonderful man. He's was funny and on the ball to the very end. H was generous, funny, kind and just a really happy guy...I'm really going to miss him
{One} Reese Witherspoon's Wedding Photos are out and I am so excited to go pick up People Magazine. Here's a preview
{Two} Anyone Watch the Academy of Country Music Awards? Carrie Underwood was looking as beautiful as ever. Gosh she makes me wish I was blonde!
{Three} Speaking of the Awards... how adorable is Blake Shelton? I was dying laughing during his opening act!
{Four} My other love Steven Tyler did amazing too!!
Not digging the pink in Carrie's hair
{five} I got accepted to Concordia University for September! Yah its kind of a let down because I was going to one of the top schools in the country and its nowhere near as good but I when I get better it'll to be closer to home for a little while. Now all I have to do is figure what I have and better. I hope to get back to regular life soon!
Going to the dentist and having his assistant say "Hi Alyssa Wow you look really grown up! your face has really matured" ...Thank You?
Going into a restaurant and seeing people at the door who look like they're opening the door for me but really they were opening the door a little bit so they could stare at my walker more. No I am not E.T
Flipping through the channels and landing on a reality show with a girl in a dress with her VAG hanging out! Whats our world coming too?
Going to bed at 9:00pm
My mom buying me 3 dollars pjamas that say hannah Montana on them. She said she got them in the adult section and didn't notice that they were hannah montana.
Even more Awkward...me wearing them.
Awesome:
Spending a few days with my best friend.
Getting him to system restore store and fix it up for me. He's a genius
Scotty McCreery from American Idol...He's so cute and I love his voice
Going to the Apple store
Being at the cash of one of your favorite clothing stores and the girl saying your bill is 167 dollars but had it not been for all the sales it would have been 400 dollars. SCORE!
I love blogging. I've been part of the blogging community for more than a few months now and its been such a great experience. I have had the opportunity to meet and become friends with so many lovely ladies I would never know otherwise. I love reading whats going on in everyones lives and giving and getting wonderful advice. I try to keep my blog full of happy and positive things but life isn't butterflies and bubble gum all time. Everyone once and awhile we hit a pothole and things get thrown off course...
So I've decided I want to give you the real picture. What my life really looks like aside from what I am loving or whos oscar gown I think was the best. (If you don't want to read this its ok I know its long)
For those of you who don't know I have been going through alot of health issues. I went away to school last September when halfway through the semester I got very sick and had to be hospitalized for six weeks. I was having constant nausea and was throwing up alot during the day. I also got a kidney stone while I was there. The doctors could never figure out why I was so sick and basically once the vomitting stopped they said its was ok for me to go even though I still wasn't feeling better. They said once I got off of hospital food and had a good home cooked meal I would feel better. They lied...
It is now almost a year and a half later and I am still not better. I am nauseous all day long, have no appetite, have extreme pain in my stomach and it gets worse after I eat. I have gone for every test humanly possible and no one can find a thing. I am many different medications including some that are meant for chemo patients (to help with nausea)
Over the last few months things have been getting worse. I am getting sicker instead of better. I have lost almost all my strength, I'm almost never able to leave the house (today was my first time in over a week), I hardly ever get out of my pjs, I just got an electric wheelchair, my meals are getting smaller and smaller. People come up to me and comment on how pale I am.I haven't told anyone this because I have been too embarrassed but the I know have a caretaker who stays with me during the day because it is too dangerous for me to be on my own as I often feel faintish and I have someone who comes in helps me with my bath. (these services have been provided to me by the health care/social work service place in my area)
To go from being completely independent to suddenly needing so much help as been extremely difficult. If you know me at all I have never been one whos good at asking for help. I'm good on my own. I don't like to depend on anyone or have anyone feel like I need them. Until today no one knows the extent of what I've been going through. I have kept most of my friends and loved ones at a distance because I don't want them to see me in this weak place or think less of me. I've done a really good job at staying away but its gets lonely. There is no one to really talk to about what I'm going through or how I'm feeling or to simply distract me for a little awhile. Sometimes it hurts my feelings that no one really calls to check in or see how I'm doing but then I have to remember I haven't really told anyone. I feel very...alone
My doctor is now filling out a referral for me to go to a special clinic in the States. Its called the undiagnosed and rare disease program in Bethesda Maryland. They only accept a few people per week so I'm praying and keeping my fingers crossed that I get to go. I can't imagine not getting better and having my life be like this. I am also going to see a new neurologist who specializes in autonomic diseases
Today was a really hard day. got an email from my school telling me I am officially no longer a student because I've been on a medical leave for more than a year and that I will have to reapply to the program when I am better. This was a bit of a wake up call for me. It reminded me how much things have changed. Going away to school was my dream and Dal was my dream school. My dream came true and I got in and I was so excited for what this new adventure was going to bring and then boom it was taken away just like that. How did i get here? back living at home with mom and dad, out of school with no life and feeling terrible all day everyday? This was supposed to be the BEST time for me. I thought I had it all.School, scholarships,friends, a social life. What I wouldn't give to be feeling better and back in school. Saying goodbye to my school and all of the wonderful experiences I thought I was going to have was hard. Also I met two of the best friends I've ever had where I went to school and now I never get to see em cause of how far apart we are. I just feel like a failure.
I don't know where I am, what I'm doing or where I am going but God I hope this is over soon.
If anything positive has come out of this its that I now appreciate even more all of my blessings. Things can change in an instant so enjoy the moment. enjoy every moment. For anyone going through something similar or just going through I hard time, keep your head up!
Thought I'd share this song with you guys. You probably knew I'm a huge Carrie Underwood fan and I just love this song. I listen to it whenever I am feeling down
And let me not forget the lovely Miss Anne Hathaway AKA Oscars cohost 2011 AKA cute as a button. I thought she did a great and looked fab thanks to the lovely styling of none other than Rachel Zoe. Love all her looks except for that blue latex disaster yo
Now all I want to do is curl up on the coach and watch The Princess Diaries 1&2 and dream that maybe one day i'll find out I'm a princess and find prince charming waiting for me!
Things I've learned from my parents and grandparents
{One} You don't need to have a lot to be happy. Its the quality of people you have in your life
{Two} Choose the people you surround yourself with carefully. My Dad always told me that the life you have is reflective of the people around. To have good things you have to be around good people
{Three} A Please, Thank you or your welcome goes along way. This is my number one piece of advice that I pass on to anyone who will listen. People will always remember a well mannered person. The best compliment I get is that I have great manners.
{Four} Treat others the way you'd like to be treated.
I love this shoot of Jayma Mays (Emma Pilsbury) and her hubby from Glee for The Nest!! I obviously LOVE Glee and I always thought she fab with her little outfits but when I found this blog all about here style I became a little obsessed!
And now It's awesome and awkward with Thursday with My girl Syd!
Awesome :
- The chicken curry we are having for dinner. YUM YUM YUM. I love spicy food so Indian food is high to die for list
- Getting Mail. Getting mail makes me so happy...I would get rid of email if it meant I could get a package in the mail everyday
- Watch the movie "You Again" with my mom and her saying "wow you look just like Odette Yustman" Gee whiz thanks Momma.
- The box of Rice Krispies I found in the Pantry. Score!!!
- My obsession with yourwiscake's blog I just love this girl. Some could say its awkward but I say Awesome
Awkward :
- Watching Justin Bieber surprise a fan on Ellen and me saying "this is so bad. her skirt is so short and shes all over him (sitting on his lap). So trashy I would have done that when I was her age. Mom: PUHH LEASE! Your telling me if you had met Justin Timberlake at 15 you would throw yourself at him. I'm pretty sure some of skirts were shorter than hers. THANKS ALOT MOM! HAHA
- Speaking with someone that speaks a different language than you. You try and talk to them as much as you can in their language but then your small attempt and speaking their language makes them think you fluent. They start talking a mile a minute and you have no idea what their saying
- Getting my new Electric wheelchair ( for when I have to walk alot) and as the mechanic is explaining to me how everything works I am thinking "Boy, I hope my dad is listening because this is going through one ear and out the other"
- Going to a restaurant and never being offered wine! The fact that the waiter does not even think their is a possibility that I could be legally allowed to drink annoys the heck out of me. I know I look like I am 12 but I am 20 swear to God. I don't really drink all that much anyways but I'd still like to be asked
if I've worn the elastic waist jeggings i got for christmas two days in a row (so far). They are comfortable and make my tush look pretty darn good if I do say so myself
that I had a chocolate chip pancake for breakfast...they were organic.
if I want up early to watch tlc's 19 kids and counting (sometimes the little couple) they are just so wholesome and happy. Its nice to see in a world with charlie sheen and his prostitutes that are some really NICE
if I am more excited about that fact that Glee is coming back on sunday then I am about the superbowl.
if I want to know how the movie "The RoomMate" ends without actually seeing it because I am too scared. Seriously I watch Dateline and get scared haha
And now What I am Loving: I am loving
that it is wednesday and American idol is on and I get to see my new crush Steven Tyler. Hopefully I won't ball again like I did after seeing Chris Medina aka the guy whos finace was in a bad car accident.
that my girl Miss Britney Spears has a new album coming out!
The Lost Valentine with Jennifer Love Hewitt and Betty White
I really really enjoyed this movie. It was such a good story. and it totally made me wanna go out and get me some red lipstick and old fashion styled dresses. I swear I was born in the wrong era.....lookin at this guy didn't hurt either
YUM!
that Katy Perry is coming to montreal!!!! Ahhh just need someone to go with me. Any takers? :)
all my bloggy friends!!! y'all are the best <3 xoxo
I am just going to put it out there...I love me some Alexander McQueen (except when its on Lady Gaga) The world really lost an extremely talented designer the day he passed. I love the shape of this dress. Its beautiful. I think red is such an elegant color.
You go Brittany S. Pierce you go. I don't know about y'all but I think Heather Morris is Fabulous. I never really noticed her until the golden globes but shes been coming out looking great all the time. I find it so funny how plain looking she is on glee and so stunning on the red carpet.
Love this dress!!
Can I just say I love this girl. She was on Ellen the other day and she was super. She joked because she plays a 15 year old on modern family but she's really 20. She said its ok ...I got the part because I'm 20 and look 12 haha. Story of my life. When I go to restaurants and we order wine the waitress never brings a glass for me. I'm not a big drinker so its ok cause I usually stick with diet coke but I'm always offended that they didn't even think to offer.
Another show stopper for the beautiful lea michele
I'm loving B from Atlantic Pacific. She has the best style and is cute as button. I may or may not have spent hours drooling over her clothes. You need to check her out. Click Here
I'm loving that American Idol is back and I ACTUALLY like it BETTER with the new Judges. Steve Tyler is a hoot and I think JLO is the perfect mix of kind and smart with actual advice to give.
I'm loving Pink's new song F*ckin Perfect.
I am loving online shopping and think I will spend some time browsing tomorrow. NOT loving some sites shipping rates. base price 22 dollars? no thanks (where are some fav places to shop online?)
Now for so what wednesday over at Life after I dew (Don't you guys just love shannon she's kind of fab!!)
So What that unless I am going to the doctor I wear pjamas...No one sees me.
So what that sometimes I don't do anything to my hair after getting out of the shower. I can't be bothered
So what if I drink more diet coke than water..I like it
So what if thursdays are one of my favorite days because its a good tv night
So what if i eat alot of carbs... theres a new diet (the carb lovers diet) and they were on rachael ray so i say its legit
Ever since I was a little girl all I've ever wanted to to wear glamourous gowns everyday. I love them. Seriously I would wear a dress every day if I could. I wanted to do prom 10 times over not because it was a great experience but because I wanted to wear as many fancy dresses as I could
Here are some gowns from the golden globes that I wish I could steal
Do I really have to comment? LOVE.
I LOVE THIS DRESS SO MUCH. It's Big, Bold and Beautiful. The color is lovely and I love how fancy it is. She looked Gorgeous and it was nice to see how well her and her husband are doing after his cancer scare. Just fabulous
The Glee cast went big this year looking a bit of alright. I think Heather Morris AKA Brittany S. Pears was looking good. This is mean but I've only ever seen her on Glee and I thought she was really unattractive but on the red carpet she's beautiful. Is that just me? Do you think they change her look on the show on purposed
Dianne Agron was a classic beauty in J Mendel. She always looks so fabulous. I love the simplicity of the dress and the way it flows. I think the red lips were the perfect pop of color.
I am just going to put it out there...I am lovin me some mustard yellow this season. I thinks it so fresh and fun and is the perfect way to remember that sunshine does exist (even through all the snow) I think Keira looks amazeballs. Her dress seems really similar to the dress Michelle Williams wore to the 2006 Oscars=
Ah My girl Carrie and I are having a bit of tiff right now. She came to Montreal with her hubs not too long ago and their rental BMW full of shopping bags was stolen and now Carrie says she never coming back to Montreal. I think that was a bit extreme cause I mean C'Mon that could really happen anywhere. I would be upset too but don't stereotype a whole sit based on one thing Its not even her car. I still love you though Carrie and hope you'll come back. Doesn't she look fab? I love the sparkles on the dress and I find that ever since she's been with Mike she just glows with happiness. I guess its true what Audrey Hepburn said "The happiest girls are the prettiest girls"
Not only does Mrs. Wahlberg have good arm candy but she's rocking it in this fab dress. I love the detail in the bust and the color is gorge
Is it just me or is it ridiculous how pretty Selena Gomez is? For someone so young she always looks so well put together. Her crotch is never hanging out, no nipple slips...she's all class. (which is more than I can say some people these days. I love this dress and I want it for myself. The color is great and I love how you get a peek-a-boo of cleavage without it being too over the top
